Monday, July 29, 2019


Joy Davidman, wife of C.S. Lewis, was in 1946 a brilliant atheist and a communist. Her marriage to Lewis and her death are described in the movie “Shadowlands.” Though she was respected as a poet and writer, her life was coming apart. Her first husband, an alcoholic, had been unfaithful to her.

Her conversion to Christianity happened one evening. She had put her two small children to bed. Her husband had called to say that he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, unable even to get home. Joy said that “for the first time my pride was forced to admit that I was not, after all, ‘the master of my fate and the captain of my soul.’ All my defenses—the walls of arrogance and cocksureness and self-love behind which I had hid from God—went down momentarily, and God came in.

“There was a Person with me in that room, directly present to my consciousness—a Person so real that all my previous life was by comparison a mere shadow play. And I myself was more alive than I had ever been. It was like waking from sleep. My perception of God lasted perhaps half a minute.”

During this intensely spiritual episode, Joy was stunned to find herself on her knees, praying. Recalling that day, Joy said, “I must say I was the world’s most surprised atheist. All I know for sure was that God was there and that he had always been there and that he loved me.”

When did God first become real for you? Or, are you waiting for such a moment?